not looking good.

I've been doing a decent job of just waiting from a phone call from Sarah or A to give us an idea of where things were headed. But, Sarah called yesterday about something completely unrelated and I had to ask if she'd heard from A's sister lately. She hadn't, but said she'd give her a call.

She just called me back to say that she had spoken to A's sister, who said she hadn't talked to A much. As far as she knows, she hasnt made a decision yet, but A asked her if she could borrow her Pack 'n Play. So, it sounds like she's planning to keep the baby. Unless she is getting a puppy and wants to use the pack 'n play as a dog crate. But, that's doubtful. Apparently there's more to the story and A's sister didn't have time to elaborate. So, I should be finding out a little more later.

I'm trying to maintain my composure. On one hand, I expected this and thought I would be prepared to handle the disappointment. On the other, I was secretly planning my mad dash to the store for diapers and such.

If you know me, you know I'm already wanting to plan my next move so that I don't feel the pain from this blow. But, I'm trying to be still and wait. The thought of fostering through DHS and hopefully adopting thereafter has been on my mind a lot. It seems that the situation presents itself almost daily lately. See...there I go already...

I know it could still go either way, and I'm praying that this takes another direction than the one it appears to be going. But for now, it's not looking good.