Thursday, April 30, 2009

Oink, Oink!

This swine flu craze is killing me! I worked in the ER last night and cannot count how many people came in just to be checked. It didn't help that a few of my attending docs were in on the pandemonium.

I don't get it. It's just the flu, people! Am I missing something? As far as I know, the people who have lost their lives* are people who were in a fragile medical state and would have likely had a poor outcome if they had gotten the regular flu. So, that means most of us, including you - reader out there, are not at risk of having a serious illness with this flu.

I'm just not buying it. Maybe I'll eat my words when I'm quarantined in my bed - but for now, I think I'll see if I can take advantage of cheap flights to Mexico** ;)

*By no means am I saying that the lives lost aren't tragic - they are!
**I do not endorse any non-urgent traveling to Mexico.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

strike one.

We got our first call today. We said no. It's hard to even type that. I can't believe we said no to taking a baby. I feel a little guilty.

2 1/2 weeks old Native American boy with some minor health issues.

My knee jerk reaction was to say yes, leave work right away and bring the little guy home with me. There were reasons to hesitate, but I figured we could work all that out later. I instantly imagined waking up in the middle of the night for feedings, rushing to get the right size of diapers on the way home, snuggling with a little one on my chest while I watch 90210 tonight ;) But, this is a child! Not a top from Target that I can return tomorrow if it doesn't fit quite right. Unfortunately we had to think quick. We knew that every minute it took us to make a decision, another family could have been found for him.

Heath and I tried to weigh the pros and cons through G chat while I left intermittently to see patients and he got phone calls from the case worker. In the end, we decided that this wasn't a good fit for us. For a few reasons. We were told in our parenting classes to avoid Native American babies if our intent was to adopt. Often times, families will foster a child for years just to have the tribe take the baby from them when parental rights are terminated. Also, while we have a day care set up, we don't have a plan on what to do with a baby that is under 6 weeks and can't go to day care. While I would love to take some "maternity leave" , I a) can't give them 12 hours notice that I'll be off for 4 weeks and b) can't take off for a month each time we get a placement.

I can't help but feel a little selfish. I mean, if we're going to be so choosy about which baby we take, who are we trying to benefit here? And, I know that becoming foster parents is mostly selfish on our part. We're doing it because we want a baby. Being a loving family to a baby who needs one is just a perk to the job. But, I also know that we have to be patient and wait for the baby that is right for us. We could be picking up our forever baby next time we get a phone call. And, while fostering is a "trial period", I don't want to be so nonchalant about it that picking up and dropping off babies becomes as common as the laundry.

So, while we had some excitement today, and we feel like we're getting closer and closer every day - today, we wait.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

My week off so far.

We went to Lawton to visit my parents. My sister who I miss dearly was in town for the weekend. We drove out to the Witchita Mts, saw some Buffali (I think that should be the plural for buffalo) and then explored Medicine Park a bit. Here are some pics.

Not sure why the lizard got so much love, but we couldn't wait to take our pics with him. I want one for my own backyard. And how adorable is that little house? There were tons of these cute little cottages built up the side of the mountain. I'll take one, please.

I headed back to Lawton on Monday to spend the day with Mom and Sis. We went antiquing and enjoyed some girlie time.

This evening I headed to the OKC Festival of Arts with my friend Natalie. We ate waaaaay too much food (upside-down pizza and cheesecake on a stick are my faves) and walked through the Myriad Gardens. I tried to be a fancy photographer and try out the Macro setting on my new point and shoot. Not too bad for a beginner.

Keeping myself busy hasn't kept my mind totally off baby stuff. But it has helped. We signed our contract with DHS yesterday and now we are officially waiting! Yay! We were told we could get a call as soon as Friday. We were also warned that we would be offered kids who were not in our requested age range (0-3months) and not to be afraid to say no. So, we're expecting to get a few offers before we bite.

I leave tomorrow for Dallas to see some of my favorite people in the world. The plan is to stay until Sunday for Miss Gracie's first birthday, but if I get a call for a baby, I'm hightailin' it back home and won't be too bummed about it.

Friday, April 17, 2009

still waiting.

Is anyone still with me? This blog totally sucks. Where the heck have I been?

Unfortunately I haven't been blogging because there really isn't much to blog about. I get asked "when are you going to get a baby?" so much in real life that I can't bear to come home and type about it.

We're waiting. Story of our life. It's become a common theme around here. And what's worse is that we're not even officially waiting yet. DHS still doesn't have our home study. I got called about two weeks ago that the reader (who 'reads' the contract after it's complete) needed a new copy of my driver's license. I faxed it right away. I find out the following Tuesday that she still hadn't mailed off the contract to DHS. Fast forward to today, and our social worker has been out of the office all week. Last she checked (one week ago) she still didn't have our home study on her desk. I have no idea if it's lost in the mail of if it's sitting there waiting on her to return on Monday. If it is...then we'll be waiting.

It's frustrating, to say the least. We rushed around for weeks trying to get the homestudy complete - all the i's dotted and t's crossed. Just for it to sit on a desk for a week. A week that we could have had a placement! Beth at A'sH keeps telling me to be patient, that God has the perfect little one just for us. But I'm sick of being patient! It's hard to be patient when you feel like you're sooooo close!

Plus, I took a week of vacation this coming week. I can't tell you how many times I imagined being home all next week with a baby. It's going to be hard when the end of next week comes and goes and no baby! I'm still hoping that doesn't happen.

But, to keep my mind off the waiting, I have a jam-packed week ahead! sister is in town from San Antonio for the weekend. So, lots of sisterly bonding time ahead!
...dinner and drinks at McNellie's with some amazing friends that are in town from North Carolina
...Heading to D-town for my sweet Gracie Ann's one year birthday. Has it really been a year already??
...Spending some time with Miss Emily while down in Dallas. Celebrating her last finals ever at the Glass Cactus!
...And, lucky me - it's employee appreciation for Urban Outfitters and Anthropologie. My sister just so happens to be a manager at UO, which means super sales for me and lots of shopping in Dallas!

Saturday, April 11, 2009


My dear friend and fellow intern, Gina, posted a recap of our intern retreat on her blog. The videos are pretty humorous and thankfully she didn't post any pictures from late in the evening. check it out. Yes, that is me stumbling around in the canoe.

No word on a baby. Still waiting.