Friday, October 10, 2008

catch up. not ketchup.

Sorry, I've been MIA lately. A few reasons why : not too much to blog about and I've been busy as heck. Back to working 75 hours a week and lovin' every second of it.

First and foremost, I'm a little late on this, but another dear friend of mine just got some horrific news. She recently found out she lost one of her IVF twins. She's trying to look on the bright side and be strong for the baby in her belly but she's very much still mourning her loss. Once again, say a little prayer for, M (a different M). Or send her a little bit of comment love. She needs it right now. Thanks

So, I acutally have a pretty slow afternoon today so I thought I'd chat you up a bit. I've spent the last few months on Peds Hem/Onc (cancer) and I think I've found my calling. There have been some extremely heartbreaking moments, but many good ones too. I absolutely adore the patients. Something about a little bald kiddo just melts my heart.

This weekend is the big OU/Tx Red River rivalry football game. My husband has been counting down the days for the last 364 days. In case you don't know, it is a huuuuuge game. And with the teams being ranked #1 and #5 (Oklahoma being numero uno, obvs.) it should be pretty exciting. We'll be spending the afternoon with some good friends of ours, so it ought to be a good time for all.

I've been meaning to post some pics from my visit to Dallas a few weeks ago. This was the weekend that I kind of broke down, but it certainly wasn't all bad. I got to spend time with some of my favorite people in the world. So, hopefully pics will be coming soon.

For those of you who have asked, I'm actually doing really well. My emotions are just all over the place. I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster. I know that's so cliche, but that describes it to a tee. I spend days or weeks on this slow, but steady ascent and before I know it I'm headed back down at a frightening speed. So, these days I've just been enjoying the ride up. And, although I hope it's a long, gradual climb - usually those lead to bigger drops once you reach the top.

I had a very uncomfortable moment last weekend. First of all, I was exhausted - I'd been on call all weekend and was just ready to really rest. I left the hospital, got cleaned up and headed to my sweet friend Sarah's baby shower. Sarah is the one who's husband's sister-in-law is A. Yes, that A. So, of course A's sister was at the shower. I wasn't really sure who she was. But, a few minutes into the gift-opening, the woman next to me says "Oh, Sarah! Did you know A had her baby! I got to go back with her and cut the cord, it was so neat!".

Excuse me? Are you seriously talking about your sister, who's baby you wanted ME to adopt? And you're doing it right in front of me? Of course at the time, I assumed it was malicious, but I don't really know that she knew who I was. Except that when I walked in the door Sarah ran up to me while calling my name. And then repeatedly mentioned mine and Heath's name. But, maybe she didn't notice.

This bothered me on many levels. One reason I was so miffed was because A's sister, who had been on of the key players in trying to make this adoption happy now seemed to be so happy about her sister's new bundle of joy. Secondly, she thinks she's telling Sarah for the first time! I would have thought she'd call Sarah immediately after the birth so that she could notify me of the final decision. She obviously had no idea what it was like to be on this side of the fence...the waiting, praying and tears that went into hoping this adoption would work.

So, I kind of shut off. I left promptly and the rest of the day wasn't all that great. But, otherwise, things have been going well. I think I'm too busy to even think about it much.

Blah. Anyway, this has turned into a novel. And, the point of it was to say that I'm doing well - and I'm afraid that's not the message I sent across. But, really, I am!

I think I'll post next about my amazing husband. I don't know what it is, but lately I just can't get enough of him. I am just so blessed. And I don't think I say it enough. So, the next post you see will be dedicated to that hottie that I like to call Bubbles :)


Kristal said...

It's so good to hear from you Erin! I'm glad to hear that you are finding your way through your residency and that things are on an up swing for you. As always, you're in my prayers. ;)

filipinobambino said...

Thanks for the update, I've been thinking of you! Can't wait to hear all about Bubbles :)

Your title makes me think of my grandma and my aunt from Iowa saying CATSUP. Cracks me up.

kari said...

I'm glad to hear that you are enjoying your work. Thanks for updating us. I'm praying for you.

mrs.leah.maria said...

Still praying for you, M and now adding M.

I can't believe that shower situation. Some people are absolutely ridiculous.

Rachel said...

That must have been so hard for you... I'm sure that she had no idea.. people just don't have a clue.

Nadine said...

Hook 'em Horns!

Nadine said...

I couldn't let that go unsaid.