so, I think they can dance.

If you haven't been watching this season of So You Think You Can Dance?, you are definitely missing out on some highly entertaining television. I laugh, I cry, I shudder with goosebumps -- it's utterly amazing. And I'm not even a dancer. I have several favorites right now, so it's still too early to tell who will be in the final 4, but so far my least faves have been the ones voted off each week. The couples that stand out right now are: Twitchington (Twitch and Kherrington), Joshua and Katee, Mark and Chelsea, and Courtney and Gev. I haven't posted anything about the show since the auditions, so I thought I would post a few of my favorites up until now. Enjoy!

just a little update.

I haven't fallen off the face of the earth... yet. I've been busy the last two weeks with residency orientation. I finished yesterday, so now it's time to start doctoring! I officially start residency on Tuesday -- then I might fall off the face of the earth!

Orientation was so long and boring. There was a little bit of excitement on Wednesday. I just cried and refused to partake in our intubation class...that's all. We had our Neonatal Resuscitation course, and at the end of the day, we had a skills class on intubation, chest tubes and inserting umbilical lines. I had heard that we would be practicing intubation on cats. Yes, live cats. I hate cats, but I love animals and I could foresee a problem with this one. As soon as I saw the vet tech take a tiny limp black kitten out of the cage, I lost it. I, tearfully, told the Attending that I would not be able to participate for ethical reasons. He wasn't very happy about it, but since it wasn't a requirement to pass the course, so there wasn't much he could do. I'm sure they'll continue intubating poor little kittens for years to come (my orthopedic friend intubated goats at his class, yikes!) but hopefully I made a small step towards saving these poor little creatures from the torture of untrained, baby fresh docs jamming ET tubes down their throats.

On a happier note, I got my medical license in the mail today! I think that makes it official. I keep waiting for something to happen to make me actually feel like a doctor, but it hasn't happened yet.

A little more excitement, in a bad way -- I got rear-ended today. I was leaving the eye doctor, feeling blind as a bat with dilated eyes and WHAM! someone slammed into the back of my pretty little car. Thank goodness for SUVs! My Explorer barely has a dent (that I can tell) but her car was probably totaled. Luckily she was insured, I wouldn't be surprised if we found that my car had more damaged than it looks once we take it in to get checked out. Fortunately no one was hurt...but there just happened to be a doctor around in case anyone was. ;)

Now, we're settled in for a nice long weekend at home. Heath leaves again on Monday for Chicago (for hopefully the last time) and I am going to try to get anything and everything done around the house before my time is no longer my own. Hopefully I won't abandon this little 'ol blog when things get busy. Oh, another good thing - I got my schedule and I'm in the ER in December. We have been planning on giving the IVF financing another shot in October and hopefully starting in Nov/Dec, so ER is the perfect rotation to be on. I will work 18 shifts in the month and have several days off in between. So, keep praying that we'll be able to move on to getting pregnant!

Have a wonderful weekend!

lookin' better.

I thought I would post a few random house pictures. We are still no where near being finished, but we're slowly getting there. We've spent more time on the yard than we have inside the house. Our house is built on a big field, so getting rid of the giant weeds has been quite a task. On top of that, I know nothing about gardening, but I've been trying to make our flower bed look a little better.

Enjoy.

The front of the house. My parents brought us some plants from their house: ground cover, monkey grass and a few lilies (which are originally from my grandmother's house...how cool is that?). I'll post pics when those start to grow in a little.

Our entry way. I love our huge front porch. One of the many items on our "wish list" is some nice furniture to fill the space and maybe some spiral topiaries for in front of the windows (which still need window coverings, by the way). I also want to replace that light fixture with an over-sized hanging lantern from PB.

The guest bedroom. I'm usually not a fan of such bright colors, but I loved these Vera Wang pillows from Khol's.

Master Bedroom. I'm still waiting on the Laura Paisley bedding from Crate and Barrel. But, this will do for now.

Love the ceiling detail.

Here is the other side of our room. We've yet to hang a mirror over the dresser. And, holy wall space...I don't know what to put on vast emptiness that is our walls. But, like I said...it's a start.

Dad's Day (Part 2)

It occurred to me last night that, had things gone as we planned (that almost makes me laugh-- as if our plan really matters) yesterday would have been Heath's first Father's Day. I almost made it through the day yesterday without even thinking about the fact that one more Father's Day has come and gone without Heath getting to celebrate being a father. In case you don't know my husband, he would make will make an amazing father. He's loving, funny, forgiving, easy-going, understanding, a great uncle, not to mention extremely handsome. Our kids will be lucky to have such a wonderful father.

It's easy for me to only focus on the pain and loss I have suffered by not being able to get pregnant, and not think about the loss that Heath must feel as well. His desire to be a parent is just as great, if not greater, than my own. On our anniversary, his card to me said "You will be a wonderful mother, and I wish I could give that to you". When we first found out we had male infertility, Heath said it was "his fault" we couldn't get pregnant. It broke my heart that he thought he could possibly be to blame. Someone asked me if I was angry at Heath or if our infertility caused a lot of fights between us. My answer was that I know that Heath is the person that I am meant to be with and that infertility is a hurdle that God has put before BOTH of us. It is an obstacle that we will overcome TOGETHER.

There are certainly no guarantees, and I'm learning to sit back and let God take the wheel for awhile, but I hope that Heath and I get to celebrate a Father's Day soon.

Dad's Day.

Happy Father's Day, Dad!

I'm so glad I got to spend the day with you today. Even though you're only an hour and a half away (or two hours if you get a little lost), I wish you were closer. You drive me crazy most of the time, but I think it's safe to say that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. From our shared love of a good light beer (or several), our sarcastic sense of humor, our innate ability to drive mom and Sarah up a wall, and a few OCD tendencies...you've definitely made me who I am today. I still appreciate you tucking me into bed each night, laying with me until I fell asleep, and then crawling back into bed with me if I had a nightmare. I'm ashamed to say, I think the last time I did the latter, I was 13! I know Heath is grateful for a father-in-law like you, and I am blessed to have a dad who loves the other man in my life. I hope you had a marvelous day with us and I can't wait to do it again! I love you!

plan b.

Once again, I was feeling empty and God managed to point me in the right direction to be filled again. I've spent the last several hours reading, crying, praying and finding strength in another's sorrow.

If you do nothing else today, watch this video. It's long, but so worth it. I stumbled across Angie Smith's blog today and cannot begin to describe the inspiration I have found from it. I, obviously, have not suffered the loss of a child, but I have felt loss and hopelessness in my journey to become a mother. God does not have a plan B, He has a plan. It might not mirror our own, but I pray that I am able to approach this plan with an ounce of the strength, humility and praise that Angie and her family has.

This video was done as part of a series at Cross Point Church. I found the video here.


Smith Family Story from Matthew Singleton on Vimeo.

Tagged. again.

I've been tagged again!Here Are the Rules: Answer the following questions about yourself. At the end of the post you pass on the questions to 6 other bloggers and list their names. Then write them a comment telling them that they've been tagged and ask them to read your blog. Let the person who tagged you know that you've accepted the challenge and refer to your post.

1. What did you do 10 years ago?

I was 16, just finishing up my sophomore year of high school. I was dating a soccer player a year older than me. I was one of the first of my friends to drive and have my own car, so I spent a lot of my time cruisin' around town with my girlfriends. We did the most random things -- from staying up all night on the driveway to hide in trees and throw ice at the paper boy, to taking the video camera to Walmart and interviewing random Army guys, telling them we were with the Real World. LOL. I was the shy, quiet one...imagine that!

2. Five items on your to-do list today:

The day is almost over, so this are the things I did

1. Work out

2. Get Heath's oil changed

3. Buy new brake pads and rotors for my car

4. Pick Heath up at airport (this is yet to happen)

5. Pack for Heath's family reunion this weekend.

3. Snacks I enjoy? Vanilla custard-style Yoplait yogurt, reduced fat Cheez-its, fudge bars, any kind of ice cream, animal crackers, colby-jack cheese.

4. What would you do if you were a billionaire? In vitro. And as soon as that was cooking, I'd start working on an adoption. Then, I'd pay off my $200K + in med school loans. Buy both of our parents houses. Send my sister to L.A. and find her a trendy little pad to live in. Travel. Buy a new car. Find a no-kill shelter to donate money to, or start my own.

5. Places I would live: I love Oklahoma. But, I think I'll always kind of regret not moving to Madison, WI when we had the chance. Or California. I loooooove Cali.

Now, I tag: Beka, Courtney, Andrea and Kristal. That's not 6, but everyone else has been tagged!

it's official.

I'm a doctor. I graduated from medical school yesterday. I was blessed to have about 30 of my family and closest friends there to cheer me on. After 21 consecutive years of school, I am finally done! It's been quite the journey, with lots of victories and defeats, but I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

Heath got me a pair of diamond earrings to replace the one I lost. He also got me a Wii! I actually wasn't aware that I wanted a Wii, but we played for about 5 hours yesterday and I'm hooked! My back and arms are so sore from golfing, boxing, baseball and several hours of MarioKart!

My parents are getting me my first Pediatric stethoscope, in baby pink of course, but until that comes, here was my gift:

It's my Doctor kit from when I was a kid! How cute is that? I love it and I'm so glad they saved it. I had forgotten that I had one until I saw it. Now, I vividly remember listening to my parents' heart and lungs with that plastic stethoscope, testing their reflexes and giving out as many shots as I could.

I don't have any pics of graduation yet, and I'm not sure I'll post them considering how hideous the academic regalia and cap are. But, Beka posted a few pics on her blog.

I could not have asked for a better week with the amazing friends I have made over the last 4 years. Graduation week was a blast. From a carnival-themed Revelry to a night of volleyball, it was the perfect way to say goodbye.

Revelry 2008



moon.bounce.



karaoke.



good.friends.
We'll miss you guys :(



And a Mug 'O Wine.



Senior Banquet 2008.



The Fab 5. I definitely would not have survived without these boys. Congrats, Doctors!



One of the craziest girls I know. I'll definitely be coming to Dallas to partay, Mer!



And, the night wouldn't be complete without me losing something, breaking something (bones included) or ruining an article of clothing. Thank goodness Heath carries an extra shirt in his truck.



Ending the week elebrating with some great friends.